Cup of Coffee: March 4, 2021

Jackie Bradley Jr. signs, Chris Antonetti moonwalks, atypical surgeries are conducted, and I name the best uniforms each team has worn.

Good morning, and welcome to Free Thursday!

I’m always happy to see the weekly visitors stop by. This week, however, I’m making a pitch to entice you to stay. I’m running a Spring Training Sale! I’m cutting 20% from the usual subscription price for the next year if you act now:

And, of course, any of you who wish to share this with others, by all means do:

Today, inspired by a buzzed Twitter rant from Tuesday night, I’m gonna start a two-parter talking about each team’s best uniforms. We’ll also talk about the still warm hot stove, the Indians president’s weasely statement about Mickey Callaway, some atypical baseball surgeries, a VERY long home run, and discuss the idea of Safe White Spaces.

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The Daily Briefing

More like Shohei O-gone-i, amirite?

We’ve started the past couple of days with big homers, so let’s do it again. Here’s Shohei Ohtani, hitting one 468 damn feet toward Interstate 10:

Sarah Langs @SlangsOnSports

SHOHEI OHTANI HOME RUN OVER THE BATTERS EYE SEASON 💪

Sorry about that headline. The newsletter is doing great but I’m still not quite to the point of being able to hire an editor who will talk me out of such things. Not that they ever could.

Jackie Bradley Jr. to sign with the Brewers

In the wee hours this morning it was reported that Jackie Bradley Jr. plans to sign a two-year, $24 million deal with the Milwaukee Brewers. According to Jeff Passan of ESPN the deal includes an opt-out after the first year.

This is what Scott Boras calls a “pillow contract.” As in, one that provides a place for Bradley to rest his head for a brief time before getting back out on the market again. Which he’ll likely want to do because, based on reports earlier this offseason that Bradley was seeking a fairly hefty long-term deal, this is not what he had in mind when he hit free agency.

A fat long-term deal may have been unrealistic for Bradley, truth be told. He had a strong finish in 2020 which gave him a line of .283/.364/.450 (118 OPS+), but he was a below average hitter the previous three years, and that sample likely stuck in the minds of clubs more than his short sample performance last year. His primary calling card, his defense in center, is still a plus, but he’s not the spectacular defender now that he was earlier in his career. A solid player, no doubt, but not someone who was likely to get a truly big contract in the current environment.

So, with Milwaukee he gets a guaranteed $24 million but, if he has a big 2021, he has the chance to get more next winter.

DH, expanded postseason off the table for 2021

Evan Drellich of The Athletic, citing “multiple people with knowledge of the communications between Major League Baseball and the Players Association,” reported last night that the universal designated hitter and expanded postseason for the 2021 season “are both dead issues with no recent movement or planned further discussion.”

This is not shocking. While those items were agreed to in a last minute fashion last year, the uncertainty of the pandemic-shortened season drove a lot of it. Now, with both sides confident of what 2021 will look like, and with both of those issues poised to be among topics in this fall and winter’s collective bargaining negotiations, agreement was always going to be harder.

As we discussed here at length a couple of months ago, to the extent the sides did talk about this over the past few months, reports suggested that MLB greatly overvalued the universal DH, behaving as if “giving” that to the players, despite MLB owners and executives wanting it just as much as the players did, was worth the players agreeing to an expanded postseason. Which made little sense given how valuable an expanded postseason was to owners and how much less value — and considerable potential downside — it presented for the players.

The owners, in other words, wanted a lot of money for nothin’ and the DH for free.

Cleveland President dodges questions about Callaway

On Tuesday, the Athletic ran a story that made it sound pretty damn well like Cleveland Indians president Chris Antonetti lied back in February when he told the press, “there had never been any complaints against Mickey [Callaway] in his time with us, either to me or to our human resources department or other leaders.” To the contrary, the new story from the Athletic reported that Antonetti and other top Cleveland brass had meetings about Callaway’s behavior and that Callaway’s harassment of Indians employees was “the worst-kept secret in the organization.”

Yesterday Antonetti appeared at a presser with Terry Francona and, not shockingly, was asked about it. And, of course, he dodged:

“I very much want to answer that. At this point I'm not able to. The last time we talked, the investigation had not yet started, so I had more latitude with what I was able to share. With the ongoing investigation, the most important thing is that the investigation is able to maintain its integrity, its thoroughness, its impartiality. And I don't want to do anything that would jeopardize that investigation. As importantly, we look forward to learning what that investigation reveals so we can make sure that we address everything in totality and not in piecemeal.”

That’s the sort of thing super guilty people say when they are leaving the courthouse after making bail. “I really want to talk about this and I look forward to having a chance to clear my name” jazz.

His original comments came three days after the first Athletic report. A report that absolutely demanded that the Indians conduct “an investigation” even if it hadn’t yet started. If not speaking during an investigation is prudent, he shouldn’t have said anything then. He did, though, because he assumed one dismissive comment would end the matter. It didn’t — because reporters Britt Ghiroli and Katie Strang stayed doggedly on the story — and now Antonetti is moonwalking. it’s pathetic.

Aaron Boone has a pacemaker installed

The New York Yankees announced yesterday that manager Aaron Boone has taken an immediate medical leave of absence to have a pacemaker installed after experiencing lightheadedness, low energy and shortness of breath over the past few weeks. The surgery took place late yesterday. Boone had open-heart surgery in 2009 to replace an aortic valve. At the time it was reported that he has a congenital heart condition called bicuspid aortic valve. It’s not clear if this is related to that.

Here’s hoping everything went smoothly and Boone is back in the dugout ASAP.

Jon Lester to have his thyroid gland removed

In other atypical baseball surgery news, Nationals starter Jon Lester has left spring training to have surgery for the removal of his thyroid gland. Nats manager Dave Martinez said that Lester had been feeling unusually tired recently and that tests indicated the need for the procedure. “Hopefully he can pitch again in about a week,” Martinez said.

Lester, a 16-year veteran, was diagnosed with a form of lymphoma during his rookie season back in 2006. He underwent chemotherapy and returned to the Red Sox in 2007 season and hasn’t missed a beat since. Here’s hoping he continues to not miss beats.

Framber Valdez broke a finger on his pitching hand

Houston Astros left-hander Framber Valdez fractured his left ring finger on a one-hopper off the bat of the New York Mets' Francisco Lindor in the first inning of his start yesterday. He stayed in the game throwing 19 more pitches before coming out. They decided to X-ray it after he hit the clubhouse and, yup, it’s a break. It’s unclear how long he’ll be out, but the injury was characterized as “serious” by Jon Heyman, for whatever that’s worth.

Valdez, who posted 3.57 ERA (126 ERA+) in 70.2 innings and had a strong postseason last year, was supposed to be a key part of the 2021 Astros rotation. Now he’ll almost certainly miss extended time to start the year.

California likely to allow fans in ballparks

California governor Gavin Newsom said yesterday that ballparks could be open to fans for every game this season. From the L.A. Times:

“We have confidence that when you look forward to April, to opening day, and where we are likely to be if we all do our jobs, if we don’t let our guard down and spike the ball — wrong sport — then I have all the confidence in the world that fans will be back safely, in a lot of these outdoor venues.”

Dodger Stadium would look weird with, like, 25% attendance, but I suppose that’s where we’re going.

U.S. players who signed with Japan are in limbo

There was a story in the New York Times yesterday about how more than a dozen players who signed with Japanese clubs in the off-season are in limbo because Japan closed its borders to non-citizens and new arrivals on January 4 in response to a spike in the spread of the coronavirus. Right now the ban extends through March 7, but that might move again.

Until the border reopens, guys like Colin Rea, Erik Thames, Domingo Santana, Adeiny Hechavarria and Justin Smoak, all of whom signed with NPB teams, are stranded outside the country. They’re having to train on their own and send video of it to their NPB teams so they can keep them on schedule and stuff, but they’ll obviously be behind one they get over there. Oh, and visa issues are still a potential problem and some guys may have to quarantine depending on where they’re coming from.

Let’s talk about uniforms

Earlier this week I took issue with the Cardinals and Nationals both wearing red jerseys in their exhibition game. On Tuesday night the Angels and Reds did the same thing:

It pissed me off and, partially because I had had a couple of bourbons at that point, I went on a mini Twitter rant about uniforms.

A lot of the rant was about how too many teams wear red. Which they do. Too many teams wear blue too, but I like blue better so I guess I let that pass a little easier. The discussion devolved a bit from there with (very wrong) Mets fans taking issue with my hatred of that team’s use of black in the past — it’s an abomination — and a couple of Cardinals fans getting super salty over my saying that the Cardinals’ navy caps are better than their red ones even though they totally are.

Over the course of the rant I was met with a lot of people who vouched for various versions of uniform their team has worn that violated my strict, bourbon-fueled rules, most of which revolved around reducing red and blue and most of which involved me hating, generally speaking, solid color alternate jerseys. Which, OK, I’ll admit that was being a bit absolutest. Some solids look OK. Some reds are necessary. Even if I’d like to see more variety. Now, closer so sober, I understand people’s need for nuance.

And I totally reject it. Indeed, I’m gonna go even more absolutist and make a list of what I would mandate each team wear if I was the God of Major League Baseball and could do whatever I wanted. I’m not going to redesign anything. I’m just going to pick to the best look each team has ever had. In the interests of limited space I’m going to do the American League today and the National League tomorrow.

Object in the comments if you want to. It won’t change my mind, but feel free to object:

Yankees: The Yankees, obviously, know what looks good and how to stick with it.  With the exception of an occasional patch, some updated fabrics, and differences in tightness and looseness depending on the fashion of the time, their uniform has been unchanged for like 85 years. You don’t mess with the classics.

Red Sox: The Red Sox are always included in lists of franchises with proud and grand traditions, but even if they are a classic organization, they have mixed it up a little bit over the years. Red hats, for one thing. Changing the lettering on the road unis from blue to red. All in all, I prefer the unadulterated classic, with the navy cap and the blue “Boston” on the roadies. Which, to their credit, they’ve maintained most of the time over the past 85 years.I absolutely hate their red alternate jerseys. In the spirit of Boston’s Mission of Burma, they make me want to reach for my revolver.

Blue Jays: What they’re wearing now is probably their best. A lot of people like their blue solid alternates. I prefer white and grays with most teams, but fine, if they don’t abuse it. It’s pretty sharp for the genre.

Orioles: They’ve switched between various cartoon and various realistic birds a number of times and they’ve messed with the orange/black/white ratio on the hats too. They’ve always looked pretty sharp, though, never running away from the orange the way teams in other sports do from time to time. Of many good looks, I’m going with the cartoon bird-on-the- black-hat-with-orange-bill look they wore from 1966-70. Their alternate solid oranges are OK, but again, sparingly. And never with the pants too.

Rays: In my rant the other night I talked about how more teams than just the A’s should wear green and a lot of people cited the old Devil Rays unis and their green. Nope. Those were ugly. Don’t get nostalgic for those bad uniforms which were worn by what was then a poorly-run franchise. They got it right starting in 2008 and, while they can always change later, they look good now. Their light blue alternate solids are good. Their dark blue alternate ones are boring and blah and look like batting practice jerseys.

Twins: Their alternate red jerseys are horrible. They are the perfect example of unnecessary red that I was complaining about the other night. It’s not a core color to the franchise and never has been, and going all-in with an accent color as a full-blown uniform color is an act of conformity that they and every other team that does it should be ashamed of. No one needs this. They should be banished. This look, in contrast, which harkens back to the old Killebrew/Oliva days, is what they should always wear.

White Sox: No team has messed around with more disparate uniform concepts as much as the Chicago White Sox. You name it, and they’ve done it. Black, white, red, blue, classic, modern, pinstriped, plain, everything. And of course they wore those pajama-ass looking things in the late 70s which, my God, what were they thinking? There has been a lot of bad in there, no question, but a lot of good too. For all of that, the basic black and whites they’ve worn since the 1990s are probably the best. BUT — I’d ban the black solid alternates. They wear them far too much for one thing. What’s more, they look like what Hollywood would put some generic baseball team in if they couldn’t get the rights to a real one for a movie, calling them, like, the “Big City Bashers” or something. Embarrassing.

Tigers: The home whites they’ve had — with one weird exception — since 1934 are, in my view, the best uniforms in baseball history. I know some people have gotten mad that they’ve messed with the shape of the D in recent years, but I kinda don’t care. I like the roadies they wore in the 70s and 80s, and if they did them in a button/belt combo instead of a pullover, it’d be ideal.

Royals: They messed with black in the past and it was bad. Like, Mets-bad. They now wear the light blue a lot and that’s fine. Mostly, though, their home uniform has been fairly constant, ranging from a no-number-on-the-front version to a numbered version, but it’s looked good in all of those guises. I think I prefer the button-up, numbered version, which has been in use for most of the past 35 years — the best. Just a nice, clean, sharp uniform.

Indians: They’re being renamed anyway, so just start from scratch. Here’s the best idea I’ve seen for them yet. If you have to go backward, those cream alternates with the block-C caps — the navy cap, not the red one — they wore for a few years in the late 2000s and early teens was pretty sharp. They’re a wearer of gross solid reds. Blah.

Astros: They look pretty great now. Maybe the best they’ve ever looked. Even their solid orange alternates are good-looking. Just a snazzy team since they went back to the orange, white, and blue. I don’t want to sell short the late 60s-early 70s shooting star unis, though, which were also great. With that out of the way, let’s talk about the elephant in the room.

I know I’m supposed to say I liked the crazy 70s-80s tequila sunrise getup the best, because that’s what old baseball hipsters always say, but despite the fact that I am generally steeped in irony appreciation, they’re not great. I hate white shoes on baseball players. I don’t like it when numbers are on the pants. There are all kinds of things wrong with that ensemble separate and apart from the rainbow design, and I don’t care how nostalgic/ironic people are about it.

Mariners: You can’t talk about Mariners uniforms when there are a bunch of Millennials around because they have crazy nostalgia for the 1990s Griffey-era Mariners that you can’t break through. But I will grant that they looked fine then. It’s just that the organization is kinda living in a perpetual 1995 — or at least wishing it could — and it’s all a bit sad, frankly. If I was in charge I’d go back to the original look with the trident-M lettering and simply change it from a double knit pullover to a button down with a belt. It’d work. They probably just need a whole reboot, though.

Angels: Given that they were one of the teams in red that pissed me off, I would ban their red solid jerseys. It’s just too damn much red. I’d actually make them re-embrace the blue they used to wear far more prominently. As is the case with most teams, white and gray are wonderful. Use most other colors as accents, especially if all you’re willing to work with is red and blue. Which is a dumb way to limit yourself. I mean, it’s not like there’s anything inherently red or blue about the name “Angels.” Hell, why not do something no other baseball team has done and go with a classic University of Washington purple and gold? Looks practically regal. I bet actual angels, if they exist, would wear that before red.

Rangers: We’re red *slap* we’re blue *slap* we’re red *slap* we’re blue *slap* we’re red AND blue. My god, the drama and indecisiveness. I prefer them in blue and, while they’ve never had a uniform that sent me to the moon, I suppose the Nolan Ryan-beating-the-shit-out-of-Robin-Ventura-era uniforms are their best look.

Athletics: Why no one else wears green is beyond me because green looks great. Not that the A’s have always been fantastic. I mean, as I said in the Astros comment, I’ve never liked white shoes on a baseball team, but I lose that fight with people every time it comes up so I’ll let it go. There’s a lot of different green to choose from with Oakland, but this is the best look and they should wear it as their regular uniform, always.

OK, so that’s the American League. I’ll do the NL tomorrow. I’m sure you all have opinions.

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Other Stuff

Safe White Spaces

When you’re a white guy — especially an unassuming, outwardly boring white guy like me — you are considered “safe” by other white guys. Bosses and other superiors in meetings at work. Guys at the bowling alley or in a bar. Neighbors chatting on the corner or at the playground. You’re one of them. You’re among friends. And because you’re considered “safe” you hear all manner of racist and sexist garbage from them. Amazing things, actually. Things those guys would never consider saying around people who were not “safe” in their eyes.

I can’t tell you how often I’ve been such situations in my life. How amazingly open and honest other white guys have felt free to be in my presence, at least if they didn’t know me very well. There have been scores of them. A partner at my law firm talking about the “talent” of women in the office, referring only to their bodies, at length, and in sickening detail. A neighbor opining about “that [n-word]” running for president back in 2008. Two men at a group dinner who assumed I’d agree with them that “most people on food stamps like not having to work.” This stuff came up conversationally. As if there was not a thought given to the offensiveness of the sentiment or a moment’s consideration given that I may not agree with them.

These were not men who you’d guess were pigs based on how they presented themselves to most people. The partner was not known to be harasser or a lech, the neighbor did not fly a confederate flag in his yard, the men at the dinner seemed like pleasant fellows at first. But they let their guard down when they were around people over whom they either had some power, as was the case of the partner, or around people who they presumed felt like they did about the world, such as the neighbor or the men at the dinner. They let their guard down when they considered themselves to be in a safe white space.

Yesterday the Lines in the Dirt blog discussed the role of safe white spaces in reference to the Kevin Mather fiasco and a recent controversy involving ESPN’s basketball guy Dan Dakich. About how, like that law firm partner, that neighbor, and those men at the restaurant, the baseball executive and the basketball analyst felt comfortable being honest about their terrible views because they were in safe white spaces. The sorts of spaces which elicit complicity and, at least until recently, discouraged pushback:

Safe white spaces are not necessarily exclusively white, nor are they exclusively male. The marker of a safe white space is that the zeitgeist of the gathering is to reinforce the status quo, while anyone with differing opinions is under heavy social pressures to self-censor or face reprisal. These spaces are ubiquitous across western society. Forums of any real power tend to be safe white spaces outside of the glare of the public, from governments to corporate boardrooms. 

It all rings so very, very true in light of my experiences in safe white spaces. As does their later argument that the noise so many are making on the right about “cancel culture” and the like is a reaction to the gradual, and welcome, disappearance of these safe white spaces. The cries of protest from people outraged that they are no longer able to give voice to their racism, sexism, or other offensiveness without consequence or judgment.

It’s a good read.

Hand Sanitizer Cam

I really and truly thought this was fake when I first saw it, but I did some Googling and, yep, it’s real.

Chaotic Neutral Pillow @IJamEcono

Somehow the Hand Sanitizer Cam at NBA games is hornier than the Kiss Cam

Call me crazy, but this is one of the first things that make me feel like we’re almost turning the corner and moving back to some semblance of normality after the year we’ve had. Like, if we can laugh at stupid, cringey shit that happens out in the world again, maybe we’ve turned a final corner.

Thanks for stopping by today. Once again, consider staying, maybe? It’s a great deal right now if you do:

Have a great day, everyone.